Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize