i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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