on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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