Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize