and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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