hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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