I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
