I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
