Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize