you're like a bully in the Christmas story
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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