Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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