The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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