Where did you get a picture of my penis
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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