They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
being pregnant is like rehab
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
