And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
