I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
