Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
