I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
