So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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