The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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