chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
