Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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