well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
