I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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