well I can't set my house on fire every night
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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