Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I wish you could order shots online.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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