that's an acceptable place to lick
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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