your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
