Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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