You're so nebulous sometimes
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
