I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
