me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize