we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
