I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize