I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i may or may not be watching the land before time
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
