I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Can Purell be used as lube?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
