how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize