Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
