i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize