how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
