this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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