3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
