I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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