I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
