i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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