the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
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