there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
