this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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