i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
