Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
